November 17, 2017

Uncomfortable High School Student

Jegging(Franklin) — If you take a look into our school handbook, who do you think the majority of the dress code rules are geared towards? If you don’t know then let me tell you, it’s the girls.

I am not allowed tear wear, leggings, tank tops, jeggings, there can be no holes in jeans, and my dress MUST fall two inches above my knee.

Why you might ask? Because as a girl in our society we are over sexualized, we are told that we can’t wear this or we can’t wear that because our clothes are “distracting.”  Distracting to whom you might ask? The boys.

We live in the south, during the summer it gets very hot and it would be nice to able to wear a tank top, or when it gets cold I would love to wear leggings because they are comfortable.

I do not care about impressing anyone, all I want is comfort when I am forced to sit in a school building for seven hours and the least that you could do for us girls is let us be comfortable.

But I am often puzzled as to why my clothes have to be “distracting,” why I am the one having to change my clothing or even sit in ISS because my clothes are “distracting.”

When you send a girl to ISS or even send them to change because of what they have on you are telling that girl that what she has on is more important than her education.

I have a solution for this, how about instead of making me change clothes we stop over sexualizing our girls. Instead of shaming girls for their bodies, teach the boys that girls are NOT sexual objects.

It is not fair to blame the girls for the boys being distracted; I do not control the actions or thoughts of another human being. It is not fair of a school system to strip my rights because the males are distracted, it’s simple, tell them it’s wrong to look.

Teach them from an early age that a woman’s body is sacred and that it is wrong to look at it in that way and maybe we would not have this problem.  All I want to do is be comfortable while in school, I’m not trying to be promiscuous I just want to wear the clothes that feel the best on my body.

 

Sincerely,

An uncomfortable HCHS student

 

Comments

  1. Dear Uncomfortable you have just showed how immature you are. I mean this in a nice way. You are young of course you feel this way. As you get more mature you will realize rules are rules for a reason. They have been made by mature adults. Good luck to you in your future. You have opinions you will do well. 🙂

    • Jacob Hopson says:

      Dear “mature person” thank you for saying this person is immature and say that there are reason why we have these rules without actually saying the “why” part. You successfully showed how “mature” you are.

  2. wendy costley says:

    I agree that there are a few too many restriction in the dress code. But they are there for a reason. Though you may feel you just want comfort other girls go way too far. This doesnt make it fair to the rest of socitey

  3. Johannah Lee says:

    I completely agree , and as a graduated student of 2014 I thought the same thing. And maybe if they taught the boys that very moral that you speak of the pregnancy rate might go down. Many o times when a girl was in the office for showing shoulders I always snickered and whispered under my breath to them “oh girl when you gone let me massage them shoulders ” it’s silly , now the shorts , that should stay in place as well as skirts , cause some peoples mama forgot to teach them class but at least make a requirement that the tshirts be long enough to cover all the parts that ain’t suppose to be showing (booty, lady parts or in other part your leggings don’t agree with ) but keep on keepin on girl .

  4. Dear Uncomfortable, it’s easier to tell a female to cover up than to have a frank discussion about respect and sex with a male, especially here in the South. I’m 47 years old, have a face that could knock a buzzard off a gut wagon, and my butt takes up a whole chair, but let me leave the house without a bra and some men will try to stare a hole in my shirt before I get back home. I don’t know exactly how old you are, but part of maturing, at least to me, is developing the ability to question ‘the way it’s always been’, and to look for a better solution. Don’t stop. Don’t accept being patted on the head and being told your little girly brain just can’t comprehend what older (not necessarily wiser) adults have decided. Now that you’ve nailed down the problem, work with others on finding a solution. And if you ever have a child, bite the bullet and have some of those hard conversations. Even one step forward is better than standing still.

  5. Our bodies are sacred so being modest and keeping them covered is our responsibility. I plan to teach my son to respect young ladies and teach my daughters to be respect worthy.

  6. Eddie McCormick says:

    I graduated in 2012. I know what exactly she is talking about, but it’s also a problem for the boys too. I’ve seen them get in trouble for a hole in their pants the size of quarter, and for having their pants tucked in their boots or wearing boots and shorts together. To me its quiet ridiculous. This student is not immature for writing this, she is just standing up for what she believes in. Don’t get me wrong some things shouldn’t be worn but there is no need in taking it too far. People should have a little freedom, nobody is asking for much.

  7. Immature??? SERIOUSLY??? I am 38 years old and deal with this on a DAILY basis. I have a “dress code” at work- dressy casual. I “buck the system” a good bit- wearing “khaki” colored jeans, and a plain T shirt or polo shirt because its comfortable. I was told that I needed to “step it up” so started wearing more dressy shirts, slacks, and accessories. I am the only woman in the office, and my coworkers started making comments immediately about me being “dolled up.” I wore a longer top that came mid thigh, “skinny” style slacks and tall boots and was told how sexy it would be if I had left off the slacks. That’s sexual harassment! And it was the manager of the business making these comments! Maybe if in high school, or his formative years, he had been taught that you don’t look at women this way, or if you do, keep your mouth shut! I wouldn’t be dealing with this now. Why is it always the woman’s place to have to listen to this kind of garbage? Mind you I am dealing with the opposite of “Uncomfortable’s” situation- I am being told to dress up more for an office environment which opens me up to derogatory comments, instead of being told to dress down to avoid them. How about the boys who will become men be taught to not treat women this way. Kudos to you for speaking out!

  8. there are lots of schools out there that dont get to choose the clothes they wear, so i consider our school is trying to prevent uniforms. yes you should get the choice of what you wear and even if there was not a strict dress code i would not allow my child to walk out of my house in a mini skirt.. kids these days tries to dress in what people call sexy clothes and without the dress code thats what they would be dressing like. now it is us as parents jobs to teach our children that everyone is equal and they should not look at a person in a sexual matter but even tho we teach out kids to be respectful does not mean they are going to be when they walk out the door. the fact of the matter is you dont like the rules as there will always be rules everywhere and we all have to follow rules we dont like or pay the price for not following those rules. high teaches you how to follow rules and to get ready for the real world and trust me when i say this not everyone has someone to teach them right from wrong especially in the real world where parents can not protect them. heard county should consider themselves lucky they dont have uniforms to wear..and trust this you would hate to have to wear the exact thing everyone else wears.

  9. Well said, excellent point and very mature. “Instead of shaming girls for their bodies, teach boys that girls aren’t sexual objects.” There’s an idea.

    Expecting girls to be the gatekeepers of boys’ bad behavior is a slippery slope to placing more serious restrictions on women’s bodies. Maybe we should put them in burqa’s. That would ensure that girls would be no distraction at all. These ideas let boys not be accountable for themselves at a time when they should be focusing on how to improve their own actions. This kind of message is the same kind that blames girls and women for assault by men. It also sends the message to boys that their behaviors are excusable or understandable, given what the girls are wearing. Seriously, if the sight of a girl in leggings or a girl’s bra strap or shoulder is too much for boys to handle, then we have a bigger problem.

    My girls have been taught to respect themselves, but also to to be respectful of others. No part of that comes from what kind of pants they are wearing.

  10. michelle sartain says:

    problem number one…..is this really the largest problems in our school?
    I think not….there are a lot larger problems to focus on.

    I’m all for individuals expressing their artistic fashions as my sister and I wore some of the wildest fashions when we were in school , and that seemed to be the big topic of the day everyday…

    if they are going to put so many restrictions on the dress code …..why don’t they just change to a school uniform that would make it much easier than telling people what they cannot wear.
    this would solve the problem.

  11. I as a parent of two teens attending heard co schools think the dress code is to strict in fact I belive if you are going to go to the extent that you have why not just do uniforms so everyone can look and feel the same. Would solve a lot of issues with a lot of different areas of school life. Such and bullying about what ppl wear and so forth. I mean pretty much it so strict now that our students should already be wearing uniforms plus a lot easier back to school shopping lol.

  12. Successful mom of three says:

    Hi honey, I support your writing out. You will have many people who will talk you down because of this, and I want you to know you have supporters. You will face this forever, whether it be school or the work place, especially given where you live. People there are still old fashioned and slightly close minded. Our bodies are OURS to control. Modesty is nice, but why is it that people seem to think that women cannot do both; be modest and comfortable? I didn’t read anything about you wanting your chest or rear end hanging out for the world (in fact leggings cover from waste to ankle just as pants) but beings as they don’t expect boys to be able to monitor themselves it comes to the women accommodating their needs, never the other way around. You are in the right with writing this,you’re body is a sacred temple that is yours to design. You shouldn’t need anyone’s okay to do so. Clearly there are some things you shouldn’t wear out of respect for yourself, but you seem to have common sense. I hope the best for you.

    Signed,
    The girl who got out of Franklin.

  13. Anna Kirkpatrick says:

    Interesting article! Stand up for what you believe in 🙂

  14. Personally I went to a school who had a dress code and no one followed it so they smacked us In the face with Polo shirts and khaki pants. So I guess what I am saying be glad you have some freedom they could always put you in uniforms.

  15. Well I agree in a lot of ways with this young lady ! And let me say this its not every girl that gets sent to ISS or home it’s only the ones that are not teachers pets or the preppy kids ! My daughter got sent home one day because of her dress was low cut at the top but no cleavage was showing as she also wore a top under it she had an hour of school left when they decided at 11 to send her to change and no she didn’t go back to school that day ! my son had wore his pants for months to school but they just notice a frey at his pocket and told him to go home seriously it’s not even a damn hole ! But our female teachers can wear tights and short ass dresses ! Our society today sucks ! As I do not allow my daughter to wear slutty clothing but then again like I said if your not a prep or teachers pet then u are screwed ! My complaints will continue each week about this ! Nough said vent over

  16. I am a 71 year old male and I see both sides of this, to me the school should change to uniforms and that way it would save the parents money and also it would stop all the rules and regulations they have now. My oldest daughter has a boy and a girl and that have always wore uniforms and they look very nice in them. It would save having to make the kids having to go to ISS because of their dress and also having their parents to bring them more clothes. Kids are going to push the limits because they are kids and that is how they are. School is not a contest to see who can dress better or “sexier” than others, it is supposed to be a place where they learn to grow up and be productive and it is a proven fact that kids grades improve when the school requires them to wear uniforms. They have less distractions and all the students will not feel that they have to be in a “fashion show” every day. Just my thoughts.

  17. Uniforms would be great!

  18. Why is it assumed that the only distraction being referred to is boys not keeping their eyes on the books? As a father of seven girls, it has been my experience that girls and boys get caught up in paying more attention to looking the coolest instead of being the smartest. That is a distraction. And while I applaud a cultural shift to respecting others for both genders, let’s keep this based in reality where girls and boys struggle with hormones, puberty, and God given attractions that are as old as Adam and Eve. A little adult intervention from several approaches can be successful, but it will be on-going as you are battling nature and Hollywood.

  19. Dear Uncomfortable,
    I applaud you and your well-spoken stand against discrimination against women. This is just a subtle form of placing blame on us. I’m sure you are not the only one who feels this way, but others may not have your backbone. Stand up for what you believe is right. It may not change anything but right will remain when the world is on fire. However, I can tell you that your attitude and maturity will take you a long way in life. High school will not matter once you leave. Life will still be there. Set your own limits, boundaries and determine what you will and will not allow in your life. You will be stronger and happier. Don’t let anyone try to tell you different and don’t live your life tied to another’s coattail. Contact your local/state office of the National Organization of Women. We have programs for younger women and would love to have you join us.

  20. In all honesty, I believe that the length of dresses and shorts should be shortened to the “finger tips” rule.
    Some of these rules are outrageous. They say it’s to
    Make us look more professional, yet they allow the boys to wear cut off jogging pants? I think not.
    I am not a girl to get dressed up for school all that often, so I decided to wear a dress one day. The day after they sent me to ISS, saying that it, in fact, was not to dress code. I hadn’t had a teacher say anything to me and, now, they have told my teachers to “watch out for me”.
    On another note, people can crack jokes all class period and it not be considered a distraction, but wearing body jewelry is? It makes no sense. If my parents can deal with me shoving needles through my face, so can the entire school. But, Y’know, I’m just a kid. My opinion doesn’t matter.
    Sincerely, another uncomfortable teen.

  21. It is nearly insulting that females would complain about not wearing leggings to school when in some countries women are not even allowed to attend school. As young women, we should be able to wear whatever but sometimes there are rules and regulations to be followed. American females have the opportunity to receive education at any and all levels… We are not the oppressed.

  22. student@hc says:

    Yes, I believe some rules are necessary to help keep order. But the no leggings, or even no sweatpants are completely ridiculous to me. IF the shirt a female wears covers her and she looks modest, I don’t see why she should not be allowed to wear it. Not being able to wear sweatpants or jogging pants is as well. This year the rules were changed to allow gym shorts, and I honestly don’t see the difference between the two.

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